Never so Lost...

These are the times when i wish God was an actual person whom you can sit down with and just ask what the fuck's going on. i never felt so confused. and alone. i really shouldn't feel this way. but its here. i'm here. no matter how shallow and petty it seems, i'm stuck with this feeling. just waiting for that divine whisper to my ear to clear my head. just a little voice that would set my heart free. but its not like that. it doesn't happen that way. we have to learn things through ourselves. we have to know pain inside and out. for ourselves. and no matter how helpless we are at the rising situations, there are no divine whispers from God. all that there is to guide our way is how we interpret the path He has set before us. unfortunately, i think God is too abstract for our human minds. our worldly eyes fixated on the shallow desires. unable to comprehend the vastness of it all. purity, virtue, morality. no matter how "good" they seem they still desaturate our sight as much as any sin. i do not want what is "good", i want what is "right". all i'm asking God is to show me what is right. because no matter how good my heart's intention are, it will never be noticed. it will never show. i just want to know what is the right thing during these hallowed times. so here we are. me writing away these little thoughts, you reading this, thinking/waiting for the whole point of this. is there a point? i don't know. this is an abstract blog. blogging details won't get me anwyhere but trouble. not everyone wants to hear all my thoughts. but then why continue reading these blogs? i don't know. still. so much to say. keep it locked up inside, don't talk about it. just talk about the weather.